Whether you’re the one receiving grace and forgiveness or giving it to someone else, grace can seem like a reward for bad behavior.

For recipients of grace, feelings of guilt entrap us into thinking that we don’t deserve grace, that the other person is wrong to forgive, and that we would rather be punished for our actions. It’s true we don’t deserve grace, but it’s not about what we deserve when it comes to love - true love.

For givers of grace, hesitation is a natural part of the process toward forgiveness. We don’t want to demonstrate approval of the behavior. We don’t want to invite a repeat of the same words or actions. However, grace and forgiveness do not excuse the infraction, but rather offer an invitation for both parties to be free of the burden.

Grace is not a reward for bad behavior. Instead, it offers an opportunity for that event to not define the relationship.

Which is harder - to extend grace or to receive grace?