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A friend once described a depressed time in her life as “dark days of the soul”—a picturesque explanation of the heavy weight that accompanied her.
As we approach resurrection weekend, I am reminded of the heavy weight that accompanied our Lord on the night He was betrayed. He knew He was in a vulnerable place and asked His friends, Peter, James, and John, to accompany Him to the Garden of Gethsemane and in prayer.
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“For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps” (1 Peter 2:21).
What a tough act to follow!
Have you ever seen a little boy on the beach, walking with his dad and leaping to make his footprints match with his father’s? That’s how I feel sometimes when I try to follow Christ’s example—like my legs are too short, my efforts too small. I feel like I can never measure up... I go from one extreme to another: determined to never make a single misstep and beat myself up for my failures or give up and decide it’s not worth the struggle. It’s an exhausting pendulum. And I was weary—beaten down by life and my own unrealistic expectations.
The trap of perfectionism had a firm hold on my life until I crumbled under the pressure of that trick of Satan. I believed that I was called to be perfect in every way: holy and beyond reproach—that to be human and express the overwhelming and natural emotions that we face was a sign of weakness and sin.
My misunderstanding of Romans 8 and the condemnation of the flesh actually had me condemning Christ, who came in the flesh.