We love building relationships. Subscribe to our blog to receive weekly encouragement in your email inbox.
Search Our Blog Posts
Blog Article Tags
Visit Our Store
Donate
You can also mail checks, made out to IRSM, to:
Iron Rose Sister Ministries
PO Box 1351
Searcy, AR 72145
IRSM is a 501(c)(3), so donations are tax-deductible.
Blog
More blog entries below
Written by Amanda Mirian, volunteer with Iron Rose Sister Ministries in João Pessoa, Brazil
In 1 Samuel chapter 25, we find a story involving God, David, Abigail, and Nabal.
David was God's anointed. Nabal is described as a rude, evil, and foolish man; "such a wicked man that no one can talk to him" (v 17 NIV). He was the husband of Abigail, a woman described as intelligent and beautiful.
David and his men offered to protect Nabal's property and servants, charging whatever he could afford. Nabal was a financially prosperous man, but in his foolishness, he refused David's request. David, in turn, was enraged by Nabal's actions and swore to kill all the men in his house.
How do you deal with injustice? What is your behavior when something unjust happens before your eyes?
The general tendency is to be overcome by anger, revolt, indignation, and the desire for the guilty party to be punished. "Whoever did such and such must pay for it!" Sometimes we forget about who was hurt or suffered the injustice, and we invest all our energy in punishing the guilty party. In this context, anger can turn me into an aggressor.
Anger is part of our repertoire of basic emotions; it appears in situations that we consider unfair. It serves to establish boundaries and prevent further harm. The goal is to stop what causes suffering.
Abigail was informed by one of her servants about what David had done for them and about Nabal's attitude. The servant said, "See what you can do" (v 17). She promptly stepped in to resolve the situation. She sent David and his soldiers a generous amount of supplies and went to meet him.
What would you say to an enraged general, marching with his 400 men, heading toward your house with the goal of killing every male? What would be the right words? What would change David's mind?
Abigail's attitude revealed the wisdom that comes from God: She listened to the needs of those who were offended, found ways to meet their needs, was a peacemaker, and based her words and actions on the fear of the Lord. She reminded David of the God he served and the battles that must be fought.
In 1 Samuel 25:23-31, some of Abigail's words were: "The Lord your God will certainly make a lasting dynasty for my lord”; “you fight the Lord’s battles”; “no wrongdoing will be found in you”; “the life of my lord will be bound securely in the bundle of the living by the Lord your God”; “When the Lord…has appointed him ruler over Israel, my lord will not have on his conscience the staggering burden of needless bloodshed or of having avenged himself.”
Hearing Abigail's words, David praised the Lord for her, acknowledging that God used her and that with her good judgment, she prevented blood from being shed in the name of revenge.
When Nabal learned all that had happened, he suffered a stroke and was paralyzed. About ten days later, the Lord struck him, and he died. When David learned of Nabal's death, he sent for Abigail and took her as his wife.
James 3:17-18 says,
But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.
David's anger could never produce God's righteousness. The attitude of a godly woman is one of peace and good judgment. When your heart is filled with fury or when someone overcome with anger crosses your path, remember the attributes of God's wisdom, remember the God you serve, be a peacemaker, and remember that a woman filled with the wisdom that comes from above can prevent war.
Besides wisdom, another characteristic of Abigail was beauty. 1 Peter 3:3-4 says,
Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.
If we want to be wise and beautiful women, we need to seek these attributes from the Lord. The work of the Holy Spirit in our lives will shape our character and guide us in situations where our emotions call us to war. The right words and correct attitudes in these situations come from God, not from ourselves. We need to be at the feet of the Master, Jesus, listening to and practicing His word, so that we are ready to deal with difficulties – our own or those of the people who cross our path.
Written by Ann Thiede, volunteer with Iron Rose Sister Ministries in Searcy, Arkansas
Set a guard over my mouth, LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips. (Ps 141:3 NIV)
Ten years ago, I joined a Beth Moore scripture memory challenge, wanting to grow more into a wise woman of faith. The verse above was my first choice. You’ve probably heard the expression “bite your tongue!”. If you examined mine closely, you’d see it’s pretty ragged. I feel at times the verse should say, “set a lock on my mouth”!
The apostle James dedicated half of chapter three in his New Testament letter, spelling out in graphic language the danger of the tongue. I encourage you to read the whole chapter. It is Holy Spirit truth worth heeding. Verses eight and nine say the following:
But no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness.
So, is there hope for a wise woman to tame her tongue? Yes, but let’s first delve into his words.
I’ve fallen into the “deadly poison” trap with gossip. Once, a very dear friend stopped me in my tracks when I started to tell her something about someone. She said, “Do I need to hear this?” I’ve seen and participated first-hand in gossip that hurt relationships, and it’s a “thorn”; a temptation from the evil one, and I do not want him having his way! Better to set a guard on my mouth and use it productively.
Jesus gives us wise words for relationship repair:
Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift. (Mt 5:23-24)
Reconciliation presents a healthy, healing way to use the tongue. Getting our hearts right with others gets our hearts right with God more than any offering we could give Him. I’ve experienced others coming to me with a grievance, and thank Jesus for supplying the humility and openness to accept whatever needed to be acknowledged. I’ve also gone to others asking forgiveness for what I believed to be a wrong done with my tongue or actions. It clears the air, leaving no room for the evil one to produce resentment or bitterness.
Another deadly poison of the tongue is cursing instead of blessing. I may not use curse words, but if you looked in my mind sometimes when aggravated, it wouldn’t be pretty, and it would be much easier for unkind words to slip out. Looking at others like Jesus would, not superficially, helps me lift up prayers for their good instead of cursing. Paul said it this way right after calling us to live no longer for ourselves, but for Jesus: “So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view” (2Co 5:16a). Once, I saw a woman screaming at her young children in the grocery store. My first impulse was worldly and judgmental. Thankfully, the Holy Spirit reminded me that I did not know her circumstances, her background, or anything about her, which helped me to pull the “thorn” out of my heart and avoid unkind words.
To help us ‘dig deeper’, Jesus says: “For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of” (Mt 12:34b). It would do well for us to meditate on these words of David, a man after God’s own heart: “Search me, God, and know my heart…” (Ps 139:23a). “Open my lips, Lord, and my mouth will declare Your praise” (Ps 51:15). “Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer” (Ps 19:14 ESV). James encourages us to “be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry” (Jas 1:19 NIV).
As you look over these thoughts and scriptures, what will help you become a wiser woman of God, blooming and growing in your quest to tame the tongue? I hope you’ll share with another sister in Christ and encourage one another.
