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Written by Nilaurys Garcia, volunteer with Iron Rose Sister Ministries in Canada
We all need people who nurture us; people we can count on in the most critical moments, both good and complicated. Knowing that we are not alone and that we can count on someone fills us with strength to face many situations. In most cases, these people can be our family, but many of us also find that support in friends—that “family” that we can choose—and give them access to the most vulnerable parts of our beings. Something I learned several years ago is that good friendships are important. Having the right people by our side can make us feel safe, loved, and can help us achieve our goals while we remain at peace. Conversely, being with people who drain, exhaust, and negatively influence us can lead us to make unwise choices and turn away from the truth. As Proverbs 18:24 says, "One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother” (NIV).
For me, this year has been focused on connections; on cultivating friendships and relationships that will help me connect with who I am, and especially to connect with God. What I have learned, and am especially grateful for, is relationships that make it possible to share experiences, advice, and the same love for spiritual things. They benefit you in a way that no other relationship can. If there is someone special that comes to your mind right now, the Lord has blessed you greatly, and I invite you to take a few minutes to thank them for their friendship and to thank God for putting them in your path.
I want to thank those who have given me a word of encouragement when I needed it most; that unexpected message saying that I was remembered and prayed over, wishing me well. I thank those friends who, although I have done my best to pretend that I am well, can look me in the eye and tell me, “I will pray for you and when you are ready, I will be there to listen to you.” I thank those friends who have become part of my family, my life, and my being, who are willing to lovingly sit with me, unselfishly looking out for my well-being. And, above all, when I need it, they can make me see what I am not doing well or what I must improve. I thank those close friends who celebrate my achievements because they know the effort it took, who jump for joy with me, and know how to dry my tears in times of difficulty. Whenever I think about these relationships, I imagine that their prayers, words of encouragement, and friendship have the same effect that Aaron and Hur had on Moses as they held up his arms when he was too tired to hold them up himself (Ex. 17:12).
I do not particularly need to talk daily with these friends, but they indeed are a constant presence in my life and have marked me so deeply. They are the ones I turn to in those moments of immense joy and extreme difficulty. I am greatly blessed to have friendships who have the same spiritual beliefs and whose presence in my life helps bring me closer to the presence of our God every day and challenge me to be a better version of myself. These friendships are the answers to the prayers I have made asking God to help me stay on His path and that He will send those who are not afraid to come find me wherever I have strayed.
To you, friend, thank you for showing me God's love at all times, and thank you for being willing to share my struggles and burdens. Thank you for being the support I need to grow closer to God every day.
Written by Deanna Brooks, volunteer with Iron Rose Sister Ministries in Arkansas
“I need you.” God did not create us to live life in isolation. He knew we needed each other for companionship, for encouragement, and for accountability.
Peter writes that Satan goes about as a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour (1 Pet. 5:8). In the wild, it is the animal separated from the herd that is in danger of being attacked. Predators seldom attack an animal protected by others.
Likewise, a person who does not have spiritual friendships is more at risk of walking the wrong path in life.
Some friends draw us closer to Jesus. They help us become what we know He wants us to be.
If our friends have nothing more to talk about than sports, movies, or other worldly pursuits, then they can’t encourage our spiritual walk. Some friends are constantly daring us to see how close we can walk to sin without getting caught or telling us it really doesn’t matter… pulling us away from the path we are trying to walk.
Scriptures give examples of several friendships.
David and Jonathan – a shepherd and a prince, whose souls were “knit together.” Jonathan did not appear to be jealous that David would be the next king instead of him. When David was hiding from Saul, Jonathan found him, “And he said to him, ‘Do not fear, for the hand of Saul my father shall not find you. You shall be king over Israel, and I shall be next to you’” (1 Sam. 23:17 ESV).
Nathan and David – a prophet willing to confront sin and a king willing to accept correction. When Nathan said, “You are the man!” (2 Sam. 12:7), David’s response was, “I have sinned against the Lord” (2 Sam. 12:13). Nathan continued to be a support and friend throughout David’s life, and we see that closeness when David and Bathsheba name a son “Nathan.”
Paul and Timothy – a missionary who began mentoring a younger man, calling him “my son in the faith” (1 Tim. 1:2 MSG).
Barnabas and Mark – relatives with the older willing to give the younger a second chance in mission work (Acts 15). We all need a second chance at times.
Naomi and Ruth – mother-in-law and daughter-in-law bound together through heartbreak (the book of Ruth). Supporting each other through difficult times creates a bond never forgotten.
Elijah and Elisha – older prophet who trained a younger prophet (2 Kings 2) who would follow in his footsteps.
Then, we also read of friendships that did not bring out the spiritual side.
Rehoboam and his young friends – he was advised to be harsher than his father Solomon, which caused the kingdom to be split (1 Kings 12).
Ahab and Jezebel – husband and wife who seem to have encouraged each other in evil (1 Kings 18-21).
Life has ups and downs, twists, and turns that we often have not planned for and do not expect. When that happens, our focus can become distorted, and we might feel our faith is under attack. A godly friend can help us refocus and work through whatever has happened.
First Corinthians 15:33 tells us, “Do not be deceived: Bad company ruins good morals.” It’s important to choose our companions wisely.
Paul also writes in 2 Corinthians 6:14, “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers.”
We sometimes walk a fine line between wanting to help (mentor) someone who is struggling and allowing their struggles to affect us. The reality is it is easier to pull someone down than lift them up.
When we have friends who encourage us to think on the good (Phil. 4:8) and to develop the Fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22,23), we have someone who will help us walk in the footsteps of Jesus and receive the crown of life.
What spiritual relationships are you nurturing in your life?
