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Written by Lisanka Martínez, volunteer with Iron Rose Sister Ministries in Venezuela
“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens a friend.” (Prov. 27:17 CEB)
We were created to be in relationships and to learn from those relationships.
It is undeniable that we are influenced by, and can influence the other people on our relational map. In this world, relationships are often complicated. Both in the family environment, as well as at work, in studies, and in the community, there will be differences, rivalries, and communication failures, among other things, that can make relationships complicated.
In the church body, we also learn about relationships, of course, with a different focus than the rest of the world. Once in Christ, even the most obstinate of human beings learns that we must love everyone, relate to all kinds of personalities, accept them, and treat them with love, as well as correct and be corrected with love. It is more difficult for some than for others. Depending on the temperament of each person, the change may be greater or less.
In my case, I grew up in a large family where most of them talked a lot, and with a loud and strong tone of voice. I, on the other hand, was quiet and limited myself to listening, expressing my opinion only if they asked me to. This distinguished me from others during my childhood and adolescence. I had few friends with whom I could express myself more openly; this caused some misunderstandings and embarrassing situations that only led me to become more withdrawn. Later, while I was studying Social Work, I began to express myself more in my relationships, both at school and with friends, but in my family relationships, I made little progress.
I learned a lot more about the exchange in relationships during my college years and in my working life. However, it wasn’t until I became part of the church that I learned so much more. I continue to learn about interpersonal relationships and the fact that God did not create us to be alone. His word says, “Two are better than one” (Eccl. 4:9 NIV).
When we are guided by the word of God and learn both from the examples of the relationships that had bad outcomes and from the ones that are good examples for believers, we can choose which path we will follow. When we understand the fruit of the Spirit and all that it generates in us, we will want to make an effort to develop it in our lives.
Likewise, when we see a brother or sister who, despite the adversities they are suffering, is ready to advise or help us, or when we understand that the sister who criticizes or judges also has faults and is as human as anyone, or when we see that sister who persists in her pride and maintains her opinions, believing herself to be wiser and less sinful than others (we may also see ourselves reflected in her conduct), we find that everything is part of God’s divine plan. Because we are blessed with His grace, every day we must try to keep the flame of brotherhood and friendship alive, despite our own mistakes or the mistakes of others. We learn that God's love is incomparable, and is what we must imitate, just as brother Paul advises when he says,
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus. (Phil. 2:3-5)
Let us try to achieve this in our relationships, not only with our sisters in faith, but also with each person who crosses our path and with whom we can share the glorious love of our Heavenly Father through the gospel of salvation along with a good deed or kind gesture.
Would you like to follow the example of our Lord Jesus Christ in His relationships?
What can we learn from each relationship with our brothers and sisters in Christ?
Are we applying that learning and that same attitude in our secular lives?
How can we improve our intra-family relationships?
May God bless us and help us reflect His peace and love every moment in all our relationships.
#IronRoseSister #teachthroughrelationships #learnthroughrelationships #learnfromothers #blog #guestwriter
Written by Michelle J. Goff, founder and director of Iron Rose Sister Ministries
Experience is the best teacher. Some things cannot be taught in a classroom, but rather must be learned in a real-life context. I can tell you how to do several things, but until I show you, until we share an experience through which we can learn together and strengthen our Christian bond, mere teaching will always fall short.
Jesus lived day in and day out for three years with the 12 apostles. We see Him teaching the crowds, but He spent even more concentrated time with His closest disciples (men and women). He revealed more to them than He did to the public. He explained the meaning behind the parables. He gave them a vision for what they would be called to do in the future.
Paul followed a similar pattern with those he mentored. Check out the summary of shared experiences with Timothy, whom he considered his “true son in the faith” (1 Tim. 1:2; 2 Tim. 1:2).
10 You, however, know all about my teaching, my way of life, my purpose, faith, patience, love, endurance, 11 persecutions, sufferings—what kinds of things happened to me in Antioch, Iconium and Lystra, the persecutions I endured. Yet the Lord rescued me from all of them. 12 In fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted, 13 while evildoers and impostors will go from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived. 14 But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it. (2 Tim. 3:10-14)
It is believed that this was the last letter that Paul penned, likely from a Roman prison. His final words were an encouragement to continue to remain true to Christ’s teaching and to the Word. It was a passing of the baton (2 Tim. 2:2) to his son and close friend. Paul even asked him to bring a cloak he left along the way and his scrolls, especially the parchments (2 Tim. 4:13). This was much more than a casual friendship.
A few verses later, in 2 Timothy 4:19, Paul sent greetings to Priscilla and Aquila, among others. In Acts 18, we learn that Priscilla and Aquila were Jews who had been living in Rome, but after getting kicked out by Claudius, ended up in Corinth. Since they were tentmakers, like Paul, he stayed and worked with them. They became his “home base” while in Corinth, which was “for some time” (Acts 18:18). Later, they join Paul in Ephesus, where they instructed Apollos about “the way of God more accurately” (Acts 18:26).
Priscilla and Aquila were like family. They had worked together in secular and Kingdom work in the port city of Corinth. We know from Paul’s two lengthiest letters that the church in Corinth struggled extensively. And based on a reference in 1 Corinthians 7, there were likely more than just two letters written to that church.
These three tentmakers had the blessing of never walking alone through a time of spiritual struggle in a church. They had a kindred spirit as family and support. It is no wonder Paul sent greetings to them by name in more than one letter.
Another disciple of Christ that Paul considered family, even a son, was Titus.
4 To Titus, my true son in our common faith: Grace and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Savior. 5 The reason I left you in Crete was that you might put in order what was left unfinished and appoint elders in every town, as I directed you. (Titus 1:4-5)
Paul trusted Titus to finish the good work they had started together. If we go back to the time when Paul and Barnabas parted company, we recognize that Paul was picky about who he mentored and who he trusted (Acts 15:36-41). Barnabas mentored John Mark and Paul chose Silas with whom to take his second missionary journey. Later, Paul forgave Mark and even asked for him to visit (2 Tim. 4:11).
The greetings in Romans 16 are evidence of the time Paul spent with each of those people: the shared experiences, being in each other’s homes, the friends and a few relatives, the coworkers, including, of course Priscilla and Aquila. The letter to the Romans was penned by Tertius, who sent along his own greetings (Rom. 16:22). I suspect Tertius got to hear more stories than just what he scribed in the letter to the Christians in Rome.
Which leads me to one final way I will mention that Paul taught: by writing letters together. First Corinthians was written by Paul, along with Sosthenes. Second Corinthians and Philippians were written by Paul and Timothy. First and Second Thessalonians were written by Paul, Silas, and Timothy.
I can’t wait to get to heaven and listen to all the stories shared by the reunion of these old friends and coworkers in the Kingdom. What stories and experiences have you learned through?
#IronRoseSister #teachthroughrelationships #learnthroughrelationships #learnfromamentor #mentoring #Paul #missionsexperience #blog #MichelleJGoff
