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The past several nights, I have had more restless sleep than normal. I have been awakened by pain, by crazy dreams, and, at times, by fear.

I am humbled by those I know that live in constant, daily pain and suffer to a much greater degree than I do. My prayers are with them and I do not, in any way, minimize their pain.

However, being awakened by pain is a somewhat normal occurrence for anyone. The pain can be temporary or chronic, physical or emotional, understood or undefined. The greater challenge is when the pain is coupled with fear.

For me, the fear has been that my pain would go from temporary to permanent, that the surgery did not solve the underlying issue, and that I have triggered a new complication in my throat, not to mention the fears regarding the future of the ministry... but I will leave those fears for another day ;)

What I will leave you with today is the challenge I am giving myself. It is nothing I have not known or told myself and others many times in the past. It is more a reminder of what I already know: Every time I awaken in pain or fear, I will immediately give it to God rather than dwell on it. Yes. Simple as that. Simple to say, but challenging to remember in the moment.

May our pain and fear transform into hope and trust in God's hands.

The length and amount of confessions could be endless.  I had surgery last Wednesday, so I am feeling especially vulnerable physically and emotionally.  Since sitting still and resting do not fit well into my persona, the recuperation time required have been more than a bit challenging.
My mom flew in for a few days to take care of me post-procedure, for which I am eternally grateful.  My sister has taken over and is juggling my care with the care of her own family, including an adventurous 13-month old who delightfully poured an entire pitcher of juice on the floor this afternoon.
I would much rather care for others than have others take care of me.  It is one of my greatest faults and as I go through recovery from a surgery and also an end-of-year fund-raising campaign, I am reminded of how similarly that struggle plays out in both circumstances.
For some, for me at least, it is hard to ask for help when I need it.  But I do need your help and God's help.  I need to trust God's provision and His healing - for the ministry and for myself.  I need your patience as I have not been as faithful with the blog entries during my recovery.  I need your prayers for my healing and for the ministry.  And I need your financial support or connections to be able to accomplish what I feel God has called me to do and be a part of in 2014 and beyond.
An end-of-year fund-raising report and request will be sent out by the end of this month detailing the ways God has already worked through IRSM this year and lining out the ways we are already working toward specific 2014 plans.  Please let me know if you know of someone else that would like to be a part of this growing ministry.
Thank you for your prayers and your interest in all God is doing through Iron Rose Sister Ministries.  We're all in this together.