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Written by Nilaurys Garcia, volunteer with Iron Rose Sister Ministries in Canada
What a joy it is when you get along with all of the people in your circle, or those with whom you associate. There is a sense of peace in those moments and it can be even a little scary because you wonder when something might go wrong in one of those relationships. If I tell you that having differences of opinion is normal and that you can't get along with everyone all of the time, chances are, you'd agree with me. It's easy to have a good relationship with someone with whom you always get along and who thinks like you. It requires more effort when there have been exchanges of not-so-friendly words or when the other person has hurt your feelings.
You may have heard the phrase, “divide and conquer.” It is a well-known strategy in games, in wars, and in situations where the enemy must be separated so their strength will be weakened, most of the time because they will not have the support of a team. Sometimes I have used this strategy to complete a project by having the team split up the tasks and thereby conquering the goal.
Taking it to a more personal and relational level, I have tried to divide or separate people from the way they behaved in the past. I remember who they are and how they responded, and that helps me have a clearer and more objective approach as I deal with the current situation. While a negative impression based on past events will certainly impact our response, it should not determine the way we deal with a current situation. When we separate the bad from the good, we will get better results. A relationship can change a lot when the context is changed, meaning the place, the other participants, and even the topics of conversation.
I like to think about the opposite of “divide and conquer,” the sum of everyone’s efforts can outweigh each individual’s work. It sounds a bit complicated, but there´s a reason why the opposite works very well against enemies. Returning to the strategy where activities are separated to achieve a common goal, much more can be achieved when we collaborate for the fulfillment of an objective since there is support and complement. A biblical example is that a rope made of three strands is more difficult to break. "
Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken!" (Eccl. 4:12 NIV)
The relationship we have with Christ is easier if we do it in community, instead of trying to do it on our own. On more than one occasion I have needed help from my family in Christ to face a situation, reaffirm my faith, and get much closer to our Creator. When thinking about how to counteract the effects of division, a story that comes to mind is found in Exodus 17:8-13, when Joshua leads the people in battle against the Amalekites.
Moses supported the Israelite army from the top of a nearby hill by holding up the rod of God. If Moses lowered his arms, the enemy would overpower Joshua’s army. To achieve victory, Aaron and Hur supported Moses, holding up both of his arms until sunset. Isn't this story wonderful? I get excited knowing that the united support of a few and the efforts of many gave the victory to Israel. I wonder what would have happened if Aaron had been angry with Moses over some argument between brothers and refused to help him. It would be a very different ending.
Although I have had moments when I have wanted to surrender, I have had the support of the people with whom I have relationships to encourage me to move forward. I see this in the effort of my brethren in preventing the enemy from dividing and conquering me in my Christian walk. When we have differences with others, we cannot let disagreement become a barrier in our relationships, destroy unity, or let one of our brothers or sisters fall simply because they have a different opinion from ours. And at other times, it might very well be me that is the difficult person to love, and the one who needs my loved ones to see beyond my complicated attitude.
Would you join me in staying united to protect the people of God?
Written by Deanna Brooks, volunteer with Iron Rose Sister Ministries in Arkansas
Paul and Barnabas teach us that different personalities are able to work together when God is the focus.
Acts 4:36-37 (ESV) introduces us to Barnabas. “Thus Joseph, who was also called by the apostles Barnabas (which means son of encouragement), a Levite, a native of Cyprus, sold a field that belonged to him and brought the money and laid it at the apostles' feet.”
Paul comes on the scene in Acts 7:58-8:1, called by his Jewish name Saul, holding the garments of those stoning Stephen and approving the execution, indicating that he had some authority among Jewish leaders. He was born in Tarsus, an ancient city off the coast of the northern Mediterranean Sea. Philippians 3:5-6 says he was of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews, a Pharisee. He would have considered Jesus a false prophet because of His claim to be the Son of God. He would have believed the new disciples were leaving the true God of Judaism, much like his ancestors did in following Canaanite gods.
Saul grew up in Jerusalem and studied at the school of Gamaliel (Acts 22:3).
Saul went to Damascus with a letter of authority from the high priest of the synagogue, intending to persecute the church there. On the way, he encountered Jesus and was baptized by Ananias. He began preaching in Damascus soon after he was baptized, amazing the disciples who knew he had originally come with the intent to persecute the Christians there (Acts 9:21).
When Saul returned to Jerusalem, the disciples were afraid of him; they remembered him as a persecutor of the church. But Barnabas stood by his side and introduced him to the apostles (Acts 9:26-27). They didn’t trust Saul, but they did trust Barnabas.
The disciples had scattered after the stoning of Stephen. In Acts 11 word reaches Jerusalem that there were believers in Antioch, and Barnabas was sent to investigate. Acts 11:23 tells us, “When he came and saw the grace of God, he was glad, and he exhorted them all to remain faithful to the Lord.”
Barnabas then went to Tarsus to look for Saul, who had been sent there by the disciples in Jerusalem for his safety (Acts 9:30; 11:25-26), and brought him to Antioch where they worked together for a year.
Acts 13:2 reads, “…the Holy Spirit said, ‘Set apart for me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them.’”
Another missionary disciple, John Mark, went with Saul and Barnabas on this first missionary journey, assisting them as they went from town to town. At Paphos, Mark leaves and returns home.
Acts 13:9 refers to “Saul, who was also called Paul,” and from this point on we read of Paul and Barnabas as they continue without Mark. This journey was filled with receptive hearts as well as persecution from the Jews, who sometimes followed from town to town.
When Paul and Barnabas finished this first journey, they sailed back to Antioch, gathered the church together, and declared all that God had done through them and how He had opened the door of faith for the Gentiles.
Even after all the persecution, Paul and Barnabas began planning a second missionary journey. Barnabas wanted to take Mark again, giving him another opportunity, but Paul opposed taking him and they argued. Acts 15:39 calls it a “sharp disagreement.”
As a result of this disagreement, they went different ways; Barnabas took Mark, Paul took Silas, and the gospel was spread in two directions. Paul completed three missionary journeys. We do not have detail about the further work of Barnabas.
Paul appears to be goal-oriented… he had a purpose, a plan… and he did not want it disrupted. He probably made decisions quickly, then stood by those decisions.
Barnabas appears to be relationship-oriented, looking for those who needed encouragement. He probably took his time making decisions, evaluating what the need was before acting.
Despite the disagreement, it appears Paul kept up with the work of Barnabas and Mark. In 2 Timothy 4:11 Paul wrote, “Luke alone is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, for he is very useful to me for ministry.”
Paul values Mark, and we assume the disagreement between Paul and Barnabas was not a permanent rift. In Christ-filled relationships, good friends can have sharp disagreements and still maintain respect and friendship.
The confidence Barnabas had in Mark may well have been what encouraged him to write his gospel.
Just as God used Paul and Barnabas despite their differences, He can use our different personalities for His purposes. Paul had intense zeal; Barnabas had a heart for people. We can learn from both of them.